West Ham Online

"Looking at 5 days in Pattaya, 12 in Phuket & 3 in bangcock . Worth hiring a car (£160 ish for 19 days) or sticking to internal flights/taxis. Will be going with a female friend (platonic) so not looking for ladyboys hookers or drugs. We are aware Pattaya is sin city so will just be window shopping . The dates will be Christmas in Pattaya and new years in Phuket . Cheers"

"I'd suggest Jontiem rather than Pattaya unless you're looking for boxes to tick; far better beaches and much less raw sewerage in the sea. I believe that we have a poster that lives there who can better advise. Plus, Pattaya is like Jaywick but without the culture; have a few friends who migrated north (east) from there and they all say that you (now) only go to Pattaya for one thing... Plenty of western expats in both holiday areas though and if you're doing Christmas there, it might be worth picking a hotel that puts on a Xmas lunch and nailing down a couple of places early (Cousin of mine used to supply all the decent Xmas crackers to the better hotels in Thailand until he retired a few years back - that's his advice to me, not mine to you.) Better put a few pictures of temples, mountains & elephants on your social media profile afterwards otherwise people will never believe the reason you say you went :-)"

flights were cheap as piss when i was last out there. bangkok's my favourite city in the world bar none. never a dull moment.